Thursday, December 28, 2017

Prepper Product Review: Cerbior DC 12V Portable Tire Inflator / Air Compressor Pump for Car

A package from Amazon recently arrived for me.  I got a Cerbior DC 12V Portable Tire Inflator.  It's a small Air Compressor for the car that costs less than $30. It allows me to inflate my car tires without relying on air from the gas station.  Since a Zombie Apocalypse might be rough on tires, I figure it is a good thing to have for the bug out vehicle.

Tire Inflator Description and Accessories

The compressor itself is very small and light weight.  It is probably less than a foot long.  The air hose and the power cord are both generously long.  This makes it easy to reach each car tire easily.  The air hose has a bronze fitting that screws onto the valve stem of your tire.  

The Cerbior Portable Air Compressor comes in a small black bag which makes it easy to store in the trunk of your car.  The bag has the look of a black canvas tactical pouch.  The little compressor also comes with attachments for inflating things like air mattresses and footballs.  


Tire Inflator Operation

The air compressor has a long rubber hose that attaches to the valve stem of your tire via a bronze fitting that screws right onto your tire.  It makes for a secure attachment, but it takes a little effort to line it up and screw it down onto your tire.  It also means that you can't instantly remove the hose when you have reached the appropriate tire pressure.  However, you quickly gain a sense for how to attach and when to remove the hose.



The tire inflator has an air pressure gauge on the top.  The gauge provides a good sense of how much air is in your tire.  However, I found that it was not a precise measurement.  Instead, I used a digital tire gauge to determine my tire pressures.  The manufacturer estimates that it may take 5 minutes to inflate an empty tire using this little compressor.  Making adjustments to tires that are already inflated is a little quicker.


Once you are done inflating your tires, they recommend that you allow a few minutes for the unit to cool down before you pack it back up for storage.

This little unit is not rated for inflating truck and SUV tires.  Cerbior sells a larger unit for that task.  This Portable Tire Inflator is only for regular passenger car tires and smaller tires.

Overall, I thought the Cerbior Portable Tire Inflator did a great job.  I was really happy to have the Tire Pressure Sensors (TPS) stop fussing at me for underinflated tires.  I was also happy that I didn't have to make a trip to the gas station to adjust my tire pressures appropriately.  This little kit is the perfect addition for a passenger car that will serve as your bug-out vehicle.

Friday, December 15, 2017

Do Zombies Remember Their Lives?

One of the most interesting questions in the field of Zombie research is - Do Zombies Remember Their Lives?  Since Zombies can only be killed by destroying their brains, it stands to reason that zombies do have brain function.

Photo by http://www.cgpgrey.com [CC BY 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

What do Zombie Brains Do?

 Zombies have very busy brains.  Zombie brain functions are used to handle involuntary tasks like breathing, circulation, and processing sensations from nerves.  The Zombie brain handles the five senses:  sight, hearing, touch, taste, and smell.  The Zombie brain must also propel Zombies towards satisfying their hunger by eating humans.

Do Zombies have Conscious Thoughts? 


When observing television and movie depictions of Zombies, it is easy to come across hints that Zombies might have some residual memories.  According to Yahoo Answers respondents, in The Walking Dead, there are small hints like a young child Zombie clutching her doll or Morgan's wife trying to return to her home as a Zombie.


Do Zombies have Conscious Thoughts? 



To me it seems like Zombies have flashes of recognition or sadness when they look into the faces of the living.  In his short story, Dog Walk of the Apocalypse, author Alexander Z Pain actually has newly re-animated Zombies say a word or two.  Of course, these aren't complex expressions.  It seems like zombies may have some fleeting moments of conscious thought, but their brains have been so scattered by death and reanimation that they cannot act on these thoughts.  Over a period of time, a zombies conscious thoughts are diminished more and more.

Monday, November 27, 2017

Stopping Zombies with a Gate

If you are going to stop Zombies from entering your community or your property, you are going to need walls, fences, and gates.  However, too many gated communities lack full fencing around the property, lack proper walls, and even lack a sufficiently strong gate.




A gate does no good if Zombies can push it down or walk right around it.  If you are going to buy a house or rent an apartment, make sure that the gate is strong enough to be worthwhile obstacle.  If it isn't going to stop intruders or stop zombie hordes, why pay for it?

Sunday, November 5, 2017

An Interview with Alexander Pain - Author of Zombie Complex.

I recently had a chance to catch up with my friend Alexander Pain.  Alex managed to finish his great American Zombie novel.  He recently published Zombie Complex:  The Battle for Chattahoochee Run.




Why did you write the Zombie Complex?

I've lived in gated communities for years and I've always wondered if they could be defended against Zombies.

If Zombies came to your community would you bug in or bug out?

My city can barely handle heavy traffic on Halloween.  A zombie apocalypse qould be the last traffic jam most of mt neighbor's would ever sit in.  I'd hole up for as long as the baked beans in the cupboard last.


Does your community have everything you need to survive?


No.  Unless you live off grid in the mountains with your favorite goat, you have to to out and get a few things.  In Zombie Complex, a lot of the action happens outside the gates.

What's your latest anti-zombie weapon?

I'm no Negan, but I did find the coolest black baseball bat the other day.

Did you draw inspiration from The Walking Dead? 

I love that series.  But, the TWD characters ran from Atlanta. The folks in Zombie Complex chose to stay and fight.  Zombie Complex stands alone and is not part of the TWD universe.

What was the most fun for you in writing Zombie Complex?

Writing combat scenes was kick ass.  I got to combine my love of martial arts and weapons.  I really hope readers will enjoy them.

The Zombie Complex features many characters from India.  What motivated you to have characters from such a far away place?

I've been working closely with Indian workers for many years and living near them as well.  I've felt the frictions between American and Indian cultures and felt the consequences of the shift towards a global workforce.  I've also seen the wonder and excitement of young Indians discovering our country and its freedoms.  It seemed like an area that was ripe for exploration.

Why should readers take a chance on reading Zombie Complex?


There is no risk involved.  About 16 chapters are available for preview.  Right now, the book is free with Kindle Unlimited.  And, in a world full of $12 paperbacks, the Kindle version is a steal.  I hope people download Zombie Complex and tell their friends!

Is there more to come after Zombie Complex?


I sure hope so. I plan to get a paperback version out.  I'm also working on short stories and hopefully another novel.  There's lots to explore!

Sunday, October 29, 2017

Zombie Fighting Tactics - How to Ambush Zombies

Zombies aren't the most aware of creatures.  They'll walk into almost any trap you set.  It should be relatively easy to ambush them right?  Not necessarily.  Since zombies travel in groups, sometimes very large groups, you have to choose your ambush site carefully so that you can get the Zombies, but they can't get you!

Zombies on this Raised Roadway Can't Get You Without Tumbling Off of the Roadway

One key thing to do is try to attack Zombies when they are in a position that they would hurt themselves in any attempt to get at you.  For example, if you can find a position to shoot zombies as they walk across a raised highway,  the Zombies will naturally walk towards you and off of the overpass in an attempt to get at you.



Sunday, August 20, 2017

Zombie Fighting Tactics - Get Over It

Zombies don't care if you are black or white, liberal or conservative, Republican or Democrat, Nazi or Antifa.  They think we are all tasty!
Long Time Dead - By Martin SoulStealer from London, England (Long Time Dead) [CC BY 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons
If you are human and alive and the Zombies come, you are going to have to set aside your differences with other people, you are going to have to let past injustices go, you are going to have to set aside hatred, and you are going to have to work hard together in order to survive.

Tuesday, August 8, 2017

Zombie Preps - Taking A Walk

If the Zombie Apocalypse (or #Zompoc) happened tomorrow, it would be bedlam.  Tens of thousands of people might be forced to flee their homes.  Highways would be jammed and might become impassable.  If you stay in your vehicle, you'll be overtaken by the zombie hordes.  Your alternative is to walk!

Zombie Hoard at the Big Chill - photo by Jez Nicholson [CC BY-SA 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons


If you need to walk during the stress of a disaster, you'll be glad if you are used to walking or jogging during more peaceful times.  So, one of the least expensive preps for a Zombie Apocalypse becomes very, very, simple.  All you need to do is get up from your computer, grab a bottle of water, and go for a brisk walk.

If you have been sedentary for awhile, your first walk should probably be slow and of limited duration.  But, if you walk regularly, you can start adding time and distance to your walks.  After awhile, you'll find yourself in shape and ready to walk to actual destinations.  To start a walking program, take it slow, buy a decent pair of shoes, and check with your doctor if you have any health issues.

Since walking can be a bit boring, you may want a tangible way to keep track of your progress.  You might start a walking diary or participate in a 10,000 steps program through your employer. The key is to get started.  Remember:  the Zombies will feed on the slowest and those with the least endurance first!


Sunday, July 2, 2017

Zombie Fighting Tactics - Using Firearms Against Zombies

When it comes to fighting Zombies, it's natural to assume that you'll prevail if you have a firearm.  You'll reason that you can use a firearm to deliver precision shots to the head that will put Zombies down permanently.  Firearms also offer a powerful advantage in that they can be used to dispatch Zombies from a distance.



Key Numbers to Know When Using Guns Against Zombies


However, the advantages of firearms in a Zombie fight can be deceiving.  You have to consider firearms use by the numbers.  Here are some of the numbers that you'll want to consider:

1) Your firearms magazine capacity.
2) The number of accessible and loaded magazines.
3) The number of Zombies in sight.
4) The distance to the Zombies.
5) The effective range of your weapon.
6) The time it takes to bring your weapon to bear.
7) The number of accurate head shots that you can make per second.
8) The time it takes for you to reload your weapon.
9) The number of Zombies within earshot of a gunshot.

A Zombie Horde - By Martin SoulStealer from London, England (The Horde) [CC BY 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

Firearms Use Scenario - Zombie Apocalypse


Let's say you are in a developed urban area.  You have a loaded 9mm semi-automatic pistol with 15 rounds load and two additional loaded 15-round magazines.  You encounter a group of 30 zombies who are about 100 feet away from you.  Each zombie can cover 50 feet in 5 seconds.  It takes you two seconds to change magazines.  You can get off one accurate head shot per second.  In ten seconds you can kill 10 zombies, but 20 remaining zombies reach you.  If you double your rate of fire, you kill 20 zombies, but 10 zombies remain to kill you.


Zombie Math  - Why People Lose Against Zombies


The math gets even worse.  Once you start shooting, you might attract the attention of all the zombies in a 1000 foot radius.  Even if you attract 90 more zombies from 1000 feet away, if they move at you, they can reach your location in only 1 minute and 40 seconds!  Even if you survived the first assault, you now have to face a second wave with less ammunition.  Each shot is a beacon for more zombies to come your way.



Firearms Tactics Against Zombies

Here are a few tactics that may help you avoid being overwhelmed by Zombies:

1.  Concentrate Firepower.  When using a guns against Zombies, it doesn't pay to take on Zombies alone.  If you have multiple shooters, you have a higher rate of fire and a better chance of dropping the Zombies before they reach your firing position.

2. Shoot and Scoot.  Once you start shooting in an urban or suburban area, you are going to attract more and more Zombies.  To avoid getting swarmed, have a plan to rapidly exit the area to avoid being ovewhelmed.

Spartan APC SWAT Team Vehicle - By Jamesw007 (Own work) [CC BY-SA 3.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

3. Fire to Redirect Zombies.  Since Zombies are going to be attracted to the sound of gunfire, consider fighting them at a location away from your home base.  If you are going to shoot at Zombies, pick a battle location that will draw Zombies away from your camp.

4. Use Sound Suppressors.  Anything that you can do to minimize the sound of your firearm will help to minimize the number of Zombies that will be drawn into the fight.  You can pay the applicable taxes and get the permits needed to own a sound suppressor or you can improvise by sound proofing shooting positions.



Thursday, June 29, 2017

How to Escape Zombies using Three Dimensions

When you are outnumbered and on the run from a horde of mindless Zombies, you need to think your way to an escape.  While Zombies have a drive to close with you and eat you, they aren't good at predicting your next move.  Zombies also aren't good at performing complex functions like climbing, crawling, or squeezing around obstacles.  If you can think about escaping in multiple directions and get out of the box, you can elude Zombies.

Zombie Flash Mob in London - http://www.cgpgrey.com [CC BY 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

Up to Escape Zombies


Sometimes, you can climb to escape Zombies.  For example, you can use a ladder to climb to a roof, pull the ladder up after you, and then escape from the other side of the building.  Similarly, you may be able to use a fire escape or steep cliff face to get up and away from Zombies.


Fire escapes in Cincinnati. Photo shot by Derek Jensen (Tysto), 2005-August-09 {{cc-by-2.0}} 

Down to Escape Zombies


In The Walking Dead, Glenn famously hides under a rolling trash dumpster to elude a horde of zombies.  Earlier in the series, Rick and his party crawled and hid under a tank.  Zombies may not immediately grasp that their prey has executed a complex move to exit from an area.  Instead, they will tend to mill about where they last saw their prey.  Unfortunately, they can mill about for an uncomfortably long time.

By Paul Sableman (Blue Sewer Lid) [CC BY 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

Squeezing Through Obstacles


Zombies also do not seem to search exhaustively or methodically for the humans they seek.  You don't see them looking into dumpsters, searching closets, slithering into crawlspaces or climbing into attics.  They typically seem to push into obstacles to find humans when they are attracted by movement, light, or sound.  If you can squeeze through a gate, under a fence, or through an open window, they may take quite some time to figure out how to follow you.

A gap in a fence might be an escape! Photo by David Lally [CC BY-SA 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons
If you are on the run from Zombies, a tool to cut through obstacles can prove worth it.

Sunday, June 4, 2017

Inexpensive Weapons for the Zombie Apocalypse

Prepping for the Zombie Apocalypse is not the highest priority in most households.  When it comes to the family budget, money spent on prepping can be hard to come buy during an average pay period.  If you are like most people, you have to think about prepping on the cheap and you have to think about building your supplies up incrementally.  Every pay period, you buy just a little something that makes you more prepared than you were the prior week.  Here are just a few things you can do to get ready and get ready cheap.

During a Zombie Apocalypse Any Club will do!


When it comes to Zombie Apocalypse (ZPOC) weapons, it might seem impossible to get a cheap and effective weapon when you are on a tight budget.  However, you can get a weapon for less than $10.  Harbor Freight Tools usually has an 8-inch survival knife for only $8.  It has a compartment in the handle with matches, a fishing line, and a couple of hooks.  You can find what appears to be the same knife here online and even save money on gas.



Another inexpensive weapon for the Zombie Apocalypse is the baseball bat.  You can likely find well-used baseball bats for less than $10 each at your local thrift store.  I have found baseball bats for less than $5 at a variety of thrift stores in my area.

ESPN Anchor Mary Rivera -photo by Elba Maldonado (Own work) [CC BY-SA 4.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

Once you've got your weapon situation sorted out, don't forget to stock up on food staples for the long siege.

 

Sunday, April 30, 2017

Zombie Fighting Tactics - Impaling Booby Traps

Zombies are dumb.  They will fall for nearly every kind of booby trap that the living can devise.  You don't even have to hide a booby trap from a zombie.  You don't even need to use explosives or firearms in Zombie killing traps.  Large quantities of zombies can be stopped or killed using gravity and pit traps or falling rocks.  Since they aren't conscious, thinking, beings, Zombies can't reason their way out of a simple trap or think ahead to avoid traps and obstacles.  While they may follow the path of least resistance when they roam, Zombies in single-minded pursuit of humans can easily be led to fall into pits or impale themselves on spikes.  This is a big advantage that humans have over zombies.



Impaling Trap.  One easy way to stop Zombies is to arrange angled spikes in their path.  People can easily navigate their way through a spike obstacle, but Zombies will move mindlessly forward and impale themselves on the spikes.

While the actual construction of a spike trap is beyond the scope of this blog and is probably a very bad idea, the earthen fortifications at the Yorktown battlefield in Virginia are a good illustration of a spike trap.


On The Walking Dead, the character Morgan Jones is initially driven beyond the edge of sanity by the loss of his family.  For a time, he lives in a fortified area of a small down that is surrounded by impaling booby traps that regularly snag Zombies who wander into his living space.

Finally, in our modern society, wrought iron fences with spiked fence posts regularly impale drunken burglar-Americans who attempt to trespass.  After a Zombie apocalypse, such fences will likely immobilize some portion of Zombies who attempt to get over them.

Tuesday, April 4, 2017

How Can I Hide From Zombies?

Can You Hide From Zombies?


You can fight Zombies.  You can run from Zombies.  But, can you hide from Zombies?  It's a good question.  On AMC's The Walking Dead, you can hide from Zombies both visually and by disguising your human scent with the scent of zombies.  However, as with most things Zombie, your mileage may vary.  In fiction, authors and scriptwriters have a variety of mechanisms for Zombies to sense living humans and home in on them.  Can they hear you breath?  Can they smell your living scent?  Can they somehow sense your vital life force?  If you ever find yourself in a real life Zombie Apocalypse scenario, you will have to conduct Zombie Recon missions and observe real Zombie behavior to find out.


Personally, I like the way the Zombies on The Walking Dead operate.  They do not seem to have supernatural powers.  They primarily use their eyes and their ears to detect humans.  However, the scent of smell comes into play in several episodes when the characters were able move through large groups of Zombies by covering themselves in the smelly, rotten, entrails of the deceased.  This convention makes logical sense in that the Zombies do not have reasoning, conscious minds, and don't make fine distinctions or use tactics.  Since they don't eat each other, the sense of small must be at play.

Tips for Hiding from Zombies!


Here are six tips for hiding from Zombies:

1. Hide from Sight.  Use camouflage, terrain, and artificial barriers to keep out of sight and be hard to see in the open.  Since sight seems to be the primary scent that Zombies use to acquire targets, it would make sense that camouflage would make it hard for zombies to see you.

 2. Extinguish Light Sources.  In The Walking Dead, Zombies are attracted to light and flame.  As early as Season 1, characters learned to keep lights dim and shielded lights in order to avoid attention from Zombies.  They hung heavy blankets over house windows to keep light from escaping.

3. Minimize Sound.  Noise attracts Zombies.  Louder noises attract even more Zombies.  This is one reason to use knives and axes whenever possible instead of firearms.

4. Remain Still.  People notice motion.  Therefore, it makes sense that Zombies would also notice motion and be attracted to movement.  If you see Zombies and they don't see you, you should avoid any sudden movements that might attract their attention.

5. Keep smells to a minimum.  If Zombies can sense humans using their sense of smell, it would make sense to keep all smells to a minimum.  Cooking odors and smoke from camp fires might attract Zombies as well.

6. Disguise your smell when in close proximity to Zombies.  If the Zombies are really close to you, it might make more sense to smell like a Zombie than a human.  The characters in The Walking Dead might well be onto something.  Maybe you could disguise your smell with the scent eliminator used by hunters?  Maybe you should cover yourself in Zombie guts?  On the other hand, Zombies might be able to distinguish between the living and dead using their eyes.  The big question:  Do you feel lucky?  

Sunday, March 26, 2017

Agility Drills for More Zombie Kills

If you are going to fight Zombies, you are going to need to get up out of your chair, step away from the computer, put down your cell phone, and develop some basic fitness and agility.  Agility is crucial to fighting Zombies because you will have to elude their grasp, maneuver around them, and move quickly to make a kill.  To be successful, you are going to have to get in shape, be able to move quickly, and be able to change direction on a dime.  Here are some basic sports agility drills that will help you either escape from Zombie or get close and kill Zombie.


Until the Zombies actually shuffle over to your house, these drills will also help you play better on the football field, soccer field, or basketball court.  One word to the wise, stretch well before undertaking this exercise and move at a pace that is comfortable for you.  Over time, you can get faster and faster with these drills.

Sunday, February 26, 2017

Can You Get To Your Emergency Gear When You Need It?

If Zombies come shuffling your way, you will need to grab your gear fast.  It's a lesson I was recently reminded of while packing for an upcoming cross town move.  In the process, my wife and I are consolidating our stuff and getting rid of things we don't need.  I recently came across a "bug out bag" filled with emergency gear like weather radios, flashlights, fire starters, a mini lantern, etc.  All of which was dutifully wrapped up from our last household move.  It hadn't been touched.  This got me to thinking about a few things:

None of my gear was doing me any good packed away in the back of a closet.  Emergency gear can't help you in an emergency if you don't have it readily accessible.  The very first thing I did was pick out the best of the flashlights (a Mini Maglite), put batteries in it, and move it to the center console of our car.  Now, if I have car trouble or an accident, I have a flashlight close at hand and ready to go.  If your emergency gear isn't available during an emergency, it is a waste of money.  The Zombie Apocalypse isn't going to start when you are ready.  It will start when the Zombies are ready and where they are ready.

 

Some of the gear was deteriorating due to age.  When you pack away your gear, you have to check on it from time to time because it may deteriorate over time.  In this case, I had a radio and a lantern that had fashionable rubberized surfaces.  Over time, these surfaces get tacky and messy.  I tossed these two items and will get better quality equipment in the future.  If I wanted to preserve them a good wipe down with isopropyl alcohol might have done the job.

Vintage Solid-State Transceivers - photo by Joe Haupt from USA [CC BY-SA 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons


Some of the gear would probably not help much in my urban environment.  I found two compasses in with my gear.  Compasses are cool and would enable me to stay on course over long distance land navigation.  However, as a city slicker, I could probably just rely on familiar roads and road signs.  Even in an emergency, long distance land navigation through heavily forested terrain is pretty unlikely.

Friday, February 10, 2017

Is Your Car Ready for the Zombie Apocalypse?

Is Your Car Ready To Take On Zombies!

From World War Z to The Walking Dead, Zombies have shuffled into popular culture.  But, if Zombies actually shuffled into your world, would you be ready?  Is your car ready to get your family out of a Zombie Apocalypse?  When the Zombies are close at hand and you turn the key, will it start, will it run, will it roll over some Zombies and keep going?  This quiz will help you assess your vehicles ready to get your family out of trouble during a disaster.

The Zombie Hord is Coming!  Are you going? - By tangi bertin from Rennes, France (La HORDE progresse  Uploaded by paris 17) [CC BY 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

Take the Zombie Apocalypse Vehicle Readiness Quiz! 


1. How Does Your Car Start?  You can't escape anything if your car won't start.  What's going to happen when you turn the key?  Assess your situation, pick the closest, and give yourself 0 to 3 points.

0 - Won't start at all.
1 - I'll need a jump start or a push start so I can pop the clutch.
2 - Will start on the second or third try.
3 - Will start consistently on the first try.  Let's go!


2. Is Your Car Even Running?  Does your car run?  If it doesn't run, you better have good shoes on when the Zombies start pushing on your garage door.  Assess your situation and give yourself 0 to 4 points.

0 - Not running.  My cousin Earl says he'll come by and take a look.
1 - It runs.  But, it stumbles and conks out due to engine or drivetrain issues.
2 - It runs.  But, it has some minor issues and sounds funny.
3 - Runs like new!
4 - It goes like hell!  Fastest car in the neighborhood.

The Last of the V-8 Interceptors - Photo By Sicnag (Ford Falcon XB Mad Max Replica) [CC BY 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons


3. Is Your Car Gassed Up?  Starting is one thing, but you won't go far without gas.  How much is in your tank right now?  If the Zombies come, you may have to drive for miles and miles or idle along for hours in bumper-to-bumper traffic. If the Zombies come and your ride is sitting on E, your wife will kick your butt.  Be honest about how much is in your tank and give yourself 0 to 3 points.  If you plan to evacuate, it's important to have gas in your car!

0 - Low Fuel Warning Light is on.
1 - Less than a 1/4 tank
2 - Less than a 1/4 to 3/4 tank
3 - Fully gassed up

Abandoned Gas Pump - Photo By Andrew Filer from Seattle (ex-Minneapolis) (Conoco, Nebraska  Uploaded by xnatedawgx) [CC BY-SA 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

4. When Was The Last Time Your Got The Oil Changed?  Within a few months of the Zombie apocalypse, the world is going to be dirty, dusty, and generally falling down all around us.  You are going to need to keep your cars engine lubed up and running smooth.  Don't quibble about conventional or synthetic when Zombies surround your local quick oil change place.  Just give yourself 0 to 3 points for the scenario closest to your current situation. 

0 - Many miles passed oil change time
1 - Oil change needed in 500 miles
2 - Half way through current oil change mileage
3 - Just changed the oil

5. Is Your Car Good on Gas?  Northerners, how is your Fuel Consumption?  In the midst of a world-wide Zombie Apocalypse, stopping for gas every 225 miles is going to get old.  Stopping for a 30-minute electric charge in a world where the grid has gone down will get even older.  So, assess your situation and give yourself 0 to 4 points.

0 - It's electric.  Boogie woogie woogie.
1 - 10 - 15 mpg
2 - 15 - 20 mpg
3 - 20+ mpg
4 - It's electric and I have a generator with extra fuel!


 
6. All Terrain Features.  When the Zombies come, there is a good chance you might have to turn off the paved road and drive cross country.  Is your car ready?  Does it have any off-road capability that might help pull you through a Zombie apocalypse?  Give yourself 0 points if you don't have any off-road capabilities.  Give yourself 1 point for each of the off-road features listed below:

0 - None.  Keep the pavement smooth.
1 - Off Road Tires
1 - Brush Bars
1 - Roll Bar
1 - Winch
1 - Spotlights
1 - Lift Kit
1 - Snorkel Kit
1 - Low Range Gearing
1 - 4x4 or AWD

Jeep Wrangler with Off Road Package Photo By JamesHenry (Flickr: Jeep Wrangler JK) [CC BY 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

7. Preps On Board.  Do you have anything in your car that will help you in an emergency situation?  Have you prepared for a bad day on the road?  A pristine car won't help much during a zombie apocalypse.  But, give yourself a point for each of the additional emergency preps that you have in your car already.

0 - Clean and pristine like I just bought it new.
1 - Roadside emergency kit
1 - Toolbox
1 - First Aid Kit
1 - Fire Extinguisher
1 - A warm blanket or sleeping bag
1 - A day of food & water



Vehicle Zombie Readiness Assessment


If you got 0 points on questions 1 or question 2, give yourself 0 points.  You are done.  Quiz over. You aren't ready.  In a Zombie Apocalypse you aren't going anywhere, you'll get overwhelmed by an undead horde, and you will end up mindlessly shuffling around in your own garage until someone comes along and puts you out of your misery.

If your car can run, add up all of your points and let's see your totals.

2 to 9 Points - You're car is marginal and is going to add to the drama of your escape.  There is a good chance you won't survive the Zombie Apocalypse due to a problem with your vehicle.  It's time to make some upgrades to make sure it runs and has some basic equipment.
10 to 14 Points - You've got a running car and you have just as good a chance to live as anyone else.  But your vehicle isn't giving you any advantages.  You might want to think about making some upgrades for an emergency.
15 to 20 Points - You've likely got a running car and some additional emergency equipment.  You are well positioned for a clean escape.  But, there is always more you can do.
21+ Points - You have a well equipped bug-out vehicle.  Congratulations for being ready!  You can take on Zombies, Hurricanes, or anything else that forces you to evacuate via car.

No matter how you did on the quiz, there are always things you can do to be more prepared for an evacuation by car.  For example, here is how I put together a first aid kit for my car.

Thursday, January 12, 2017

What Should I Wear To Fight Zombies?

The zombies are coming, the zombies are coming, and you have nothing to wear.  It's a common problem.  Most people don't dress around the idea of participating in a Zombie Apocalypse.  But, when you expect Zombies as house guests, it is very important to dress for company.

Zombie Flash Mob - photo by http://www.cgpgrey.com [CC BY 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

Here are a few winning wardrobe ideas that will serve you well when zombies are expected for dinner:

1. Shoes for a Zombie Apocalypse.  In the world of business, men are often judged by their shoes.  Do they shine?  Are they finely made?  When the Zombies come, all such pretentiousness will be swept away.  You'll want shoes that allow you to move quickly, that are thick enough to stop a bite, that can kick or stomp on an opponent, and that don't hurt your feet on long marches.  Ultimately, you are going to want some sort of combat boot for your climate or, if you are a runner, some kind of trail running shoes.

2. Pants for a Zombie Apocalypse.  You don't want to be sitting around in your underwear when zombies come clawing at your door.  (It's o.k. now.  Don't get up.)  But, you are going to want some kind of heavy duty pants.  There are a couple of options.  You can go cowboy or commando.  If you go cowboy, you are going to want to get some heavy duty denim jeans that are thick enough to resist a bite.  If you go commando, you are going to want to get some tactical pants.  Tactical pants give you scratch and tear resistance, the ability to move around and jump, and extra pockets to carry all your survival gear.  If you are looking for tactical pants, you might check out these 5.11 Tactical Pants.  5.11 is a well respected brand in the prepping and police communities.




3. Shirts and Jackets for a Zombie Apocalypse.  When it comes to shirts, I think you are going to want a plain colored T-shirt covered with some sort of army jacket.  You'll have to pick the camouflage pattern that is best suited for your environment.  You'll think you look bad ass, but you'll probably look much like the late great Bob Hope in this picture.



4. Gloves for a Zombie Apocalypse.  When you are grappling with zombies, you are going to need some tactical gloves.  You'll probably want to get multiple pairs in case one gets Zombie gristle, brain goop, or blood on it.



5. Glasses for a Zombie Apocalypse.  If you are going to war against zombies, you are going to need to summon every ounce of bad ass in your system.  Kick ass Oakley sunglasses will definitely help.  Plus, they'll help you avoid getting stuff in an eye (shell casings, zombie bone fragments, kudzu vines, etc.).


 
6. Hats for a Zombie Apocalypse.  Finally, you are going to need some sort of helmet for a zombie apocalypse.  We've put out some guidance, but you are going to have to decide which kind of helmet is best.

Friday, January 6, 2017

Shopping before a Zombie Apocalypse

I know how I will probably perish in the Zombie Apocalypse.  It will happen at the grocery store.  The place will be mobbed with crazed shoppers trying to get food for their families before the zombies get to their neighborhood.  I'll probably be cut down in the produce aisle by someone trying to get the last oranges.

What will I be doing?  I'll trying to open one of these stupid plastic produce bags.
Plastic Produce Bags are Annoying
On a serious note, I took this picture while shopping just before a little snow and ice storm that recently hit Atlanta.  The grocery store was cleaned out of important items like eggs.  Can you imagine what it would be like if an emergency of apocalyptic proportions was headed towards your town?  It would be pandemonium.  It might even be dangerous.  Plus, there is a good chance that your grocery store would totally run out of food before you got there.  That's why it is a pretty good idea to stock up food and water supplies well in advance of an emergency.  There is no need to call it prepping.  You could just call it prudent.